25 March 2023

Distractions

As it happens, the title I just came up with is also the title of a track by Zero 7. I’d put it on right now, but I can’t possibly do so because I’m mid mix-review of something I recorded in prep for a friend’s surprise birthday that I didn’t make it to as I’m tired and pain and other reasons, ach! Well actually I was not actually even on the DJ lineup, and could have certainly offered (as I usually do and especially for mates I know will be well into it). I thought I’d prepare a potential mix especially for said person anyway, which came together quite naturally and enjoyably as it happens. A happy distraction.

The meta-distraction is forgetting what I wanted to do, why I’m here and what my purpose or goal or whatever… is… Or is that the distraction itself? I’m trying to add some clarity now and I think it’s getting much more confusing… for me… so I can’t imagine what it’s like for you, reading this and attempting to understand my brain. Neurotypicals eh? Just typical! 🙂

All in all I’m feeling happy right now, and I think I know why. It seems strange to announce without any context so here we go, deeper into the digressive distraction dungeon deviously delving darting dandily den doh!

D-trainwreck

Warning

Edit: I finished the post and hit publish so hastily I forgot to add the context I was talking about.

So here we start the post (as an afterthought ha ha!)

Here we go!

This website or blog or whatever it is, is actually more of a space for me to come and offload some stuff at this moment. The delightful thing is that one or two of my friends in real life have actually taken quite an interest, and opened up about ADHD they either suspect or didn’t really consider until recently.

We all have commonalities to be found in most cases, although our journeys may be very different.

I didn’t mean to get so analytical or philosophical in any case. I’m really here to actually get things off my mind right now, but the lovely by-product is that my thoughts are documented here, and also backed up and which I’ll be keeping safe and archiving along with many years of past web content I’ve created. Countless websites, ideas, projects and other stuff & things.

As for now, well my story should mention one of the most important things. Can you guess what?

If you guessed it was health then you’re right. I say one of the most important things, is happiness should probably be right up there with health I’d say.

It’s tough at times to do the right things for yourself, or at least that’s what I’ve found. I love helping others, and one thing I’ve noticed is that projects that are entirely my own, with nobody else involved tend not to be of the same standard as the work I produce for clients. I’ve realised that regardless of whether a client brings something to the table or not (whether it be money, skills, a vision, resources, creativity, direction or all of the above) and the same goes for a collaborator in some cases, I find that the responsibility of ensuring I deliver on my promises and maintain a consistent level of professionalism, whilst valuing the connections & friendships forged with others has an impact on the work. That’s not to say my own projects are not without merit, as some of my personal work has been the best I’ve ever created. What I’m trying to say is that I’m struggling to bring some of my personal projects to the high standards I’ve set myself, and perhaps it’s because I’m trying to do too many things at once. I think it helps me to write it, as much as I’ve said it. The repetition of truth will sow the seeds of progress.

I’d like to round up now… the 30 minute mix I was reviewing has finished. It was actually better than I thought. I thought I’d kind of botched it up a bit or the track selection was a bit too disjointed, but the end result actually sounds perfectly pleasing. As you can tell I now really want to write about my own DJ mix that I made for a friend who might never hear it, so yes I do get distracted easily… but that wasn’t the point, well actually yes it was wasn’t it? I couldn’t have been more wrong in my previous judgements of myself, however I don’t count the first listen as a real listen. Yes I’m still talking about the DJ mix. So whilst performing I don’t really focus so much on how the mix sounds so much as actually making sure it will later sound as good as it can. Does that make any sense? Leave a comment below! No, really! Please be my guest, but it might take a while to be approved as I usually only get spam comments from bots that are always crafted to sound like humans. Thanks 🙂

Anyways, what was I talking about? Gratitude.

So on that bombshell.

Sorry, that works at times, but not in this case.

I’ll have to bite the bullet and follow through.

That sounded better in than out.

As did that.

Nailed.

So, now as intended (as of writing my last paragraph) I will now say that I am genuinely grateful for the people in my life, my friends & family. It might sound clichéd, as it certainly feels that way, but I also really want to express a genuine appreciation for those around me, as doing things entirely solo isn’t as good as asking for help when you need it.

So for those of you who make it this far, and read my ramblings. Thank you, I appreciate you <3 Your feedback could end up being really important, as I will aim to take every comment on board and act where I feel appropriate to create meaningful content as time goes by.

If you like what I’ve done so far, send me a sign. If not, the empty void will be my only motivation to do more!

…distractions likely

^__^ what happens when you don’t proofread before publishing, and scramble to edit the post whilst increasing the word count by probably 1000% (everything after the part where I signed off initially before immediately re-editing) hence the amusing bit of text I just spotted at the bottom of the post. By the way, at the end I’ll say that I’ll stop now, and the moment I wrote that I thought to myself, will I? But as it turns out I realised I could just keep writing with my cursor in front of that promising ending. But now I’ve revealed my methods I’m not sure if that’s a good or a bad thing. It was also kind of a promise to myself, that I would stop now and hit publish (probably without proofreading again!). If there was any doubt that these are rambles, well… What can I say? There are things I deliver on demand and rambling turns out to be one of them. So without further a due and as promised, the moment you’ve all been waiting for. Here it comes! I’ll stop now, honest! 😀

psssssst. just back again to add one more thing. Don’t you worry, there is an unofficial, but now official part II to this post: Health

These are my own words from the original ADHDre blog.